It’s been far too long since I’ve been on this website. But even after all this time I could not remove this site; I have still paid for the hosting and domain all this time. I guess it feels nice to have my own personal space on the internet where I can rant, rave and share special moments.
I have not thought about posting here for a while; although I have experienced a few ups and downs since my last post, I’ve (somehow) managed to get through them. Yay me! *pats self on back*
I have had some terrible downs these past few months. Although some of these are still playing on my mind, I do not feel confident expressing these on a public blog. Some things are best kept with my therapist and my personal diary!
At the moment these downs are not directly affecting me. I just feel like at times when I do feel upset and emotional, I remember these past events and it makes me worse. A downward spiral, I guess. The problem is I don’t have an exact reason for feeling the way I do in the first place.
I’ve got a place on a full time course at my local uni, and have got a comfortable part time job to go along with it. My father (who I live with) has now found full time work again so that relaxes financial worries. I theoretically should be worry free – but I feel so sad, and keep crying for no reason. Maybe I am just an emotional person; but I do feel as though I am at the beginning of my spiral. I should book an appointment with a therapist before things get too bad.
Anyway, as it is 10:37pm on a bank holiday weekend, I am probably not going to get far in the next few days. I think I may try a few fitness routines, and my switch my night out for a night in meditating. Maybe I can refresh my mind and get myself out of this mess!